The behavior-changing power of questions
Before you read this, ask yourself: do I really need to do this right now?
Ever find yourself in one of life’s boring moments—waiting in line for coffee, riding in an elevator, caught in a monotonous work task—and suddenly feel the urge to pull out your phone for no particular reason?
I feel it often. But lately, I’ve managed to cut down on these little fits of useless phone tapping, resulting in significant drops in screen time. How? With the power of questions.
Earlier this year, I wrote a piece for The New York Times about how to have a healthier relationship with your phone. I interviewed some brilliant people and came up with five suggestions. You can read them here—hopefully you find a tip or two that suits your lifestyle.
The advice that really stuck with me came from Richard J. Davidson, the founder and director of the Center for Healthy Minds at the University of Wisconsin-Madison. Dr. Davidson is an expert on mindfulness and also the founder of the non-profit Healthy Minds Innovations.
Dr. Davidson told me that to resist unnecessary screen time, you need to:
Become aware of the urge before it culminates in an action.
Then, once you’re aware, ask yourself: do I really need to do this right now?
Notice what you’re doing, ask a question. It’s a simple intervention. But this basic prompt works. Now, when I find myself in a spell of awkward silence or boredom, I ask the question and, most of the time, the answer is no. I don’t need to do this. Instead of email or Instagram, I get a few seconds to think and take in the world around me.
The philosophy and science of questions.
The ancient Greek philosopher Socrates used questions as a method for self reflection and critical thinking. The Socratic method is deployed all over, including the legal field, classrooms, and therapy. If Socrates were reading this post, he may ask questions such as, What is this newsletter? Why am I reading it? Why does anyone read any newsletter?
There’s also a science behind the effectiveness of asking questions for rewiring your behaviors. For decades, researchers have studied the question-behavior effect. It states that by asking questions about a certain behavior, you can alter that behavior for the better.
“The effect is seemingly straightforward,” researchers wrote in a meta-analysis. “Question a person about his or her behavior regarding a target action and the likelihood of performing the behavior in the future significantly changes.”
In one study, researchers asked college students about their exercising habits. When they checked back a couple of months later, the students had worked out more. Another study showed similar results after researchers asked participants to fill out a questionnaire about drinking. A third study used questionnaires to help people eat healthier.
One reason this works is that it can put you in a state of cognitive dissonance if you don’t follow through. If I’m telling myself I don’t need to do something, what does it mean if I then go ahead and do it anyway?
The next time you feel the urge to grab your phone…
Try Dr. Davidson’s method and ask yourself: Do I really need to do this right now?
Thanks for reading and see you next Sunday.
Eric